O.K., so we have reflected on my story...contemplated some hard questions...now, it is time to apply what we have discovered...
1. What are you trying to hide from those around you?
Past: I was falling apart, I didn't sleep at night, was starting to fail at work, and wanted nothing more than to stop feeling, stop being...I was incredibly lonely and became so anxious at times it scared me...
Present: I am scared about not having found a job almost 3 months after being laid-off...Most days it is hard to find a purpose in getting out of bed...
2. Why do you think you feel the need to hide them?
Past: I had to hide it because #1. I had been struggling with these things for so long, I felt like the 'boy who cried wolf' no one was going to care anymore, this is just who I was #2. There wasn't anything anyone could do about so why talk about it #3. Hiding goes hand in hand with hurting...it just does...
Present: Not sure why I feel like I need to hide these things...I guess I don't feel like they are anything important...Most days I am confident in God's plan for me and on the days I don't want to get out of bed, I still do...I get up and take a shower, and try to make the day productive until the day comes when I apply, interview, and am hired for my next money making job...
3. Do you think you are succeeding in keeping them hidden?
Past: Yeah, NO...I was not fooling ANYONE!!! If anyone who was close to me during that time is reading this post feel free to put in the comments how I failed at keeping it hidden...it might help someone who thinks they are hiding their hurt successfully...
Present: For the most part...but it would do me good to be more honest about my fear about only having 3 1/2 months of unemployment left...
4. If given the opportunity would you be willing to honestly work through the things you are hiding?
Past: YES! I tried counseling and was disappointed in the counselors I saw...I went to the doctor and was prescribed Effexor which helped significantly with my anxiety...and after reading the book Blue Genes by Dr. Paul Meier I decided that my only option for healing was to take a significant time off work, and go to treatment....
Present: Yes...and I believe that I do...I would seek out help and do the hard work if it got to the point I needed it...
What you are hiding has now been identified...now what? That is a fantastic question...
First, Just SIT with it...sit with the truth for a while...it is going to be uncomfortable..it is going to be painful...and it might even take you a while to accept...
Second, Once you have accepted what you are hiding...share it with someone...
Past: I was falling apart, I didn't sleep at night, was starting to fail at work, and wanted nothing more than to stop feeling, stop being...I was incredibly lonely and became so anxious at times it scared me...
Present: I am scared about not having found a job almost 3 months after being laid-off...Most days it is hard to find a purpose in getting out of bed...
2. Why do you think you feel the need to hide them?
Past: I had to hide it because #1. I had been struggling with these things for so long, I felt like the 'boy who cried wolf' no one was going to care anymore, this is just who I was #2. There wasn't anything anyone could do about so why talk about it #3. Hiding goes hand in hand with hurting...it just does...
Present: Not sure why I feel like I need to hide these things...I guess I don't feel like they are anything important...Most days I am confident in God's plan for me and on the days I don't want to get out of bed, I still do...I get up and take a shower, and try to make the day productive until the day comes when I apply, interview, and am hired for my next money making job...
3. Do you think you are succeeding in keeping them hidden?
Past: Yeah, NO...I was not fooling ANYONE!!! If anyone who was close to me during that time is reading this post feel free to put in the comments how I failed at keeping it hidden...it might help someone who thinks they are hiding their hurt successfully...
Present: For the most part...but it would do me good to be more honest about my fear about only having 3 1/2 months of unemployment left...
4. If given the opportunity would you be willing to honestly work through the things you are hiding?
Past: YES! I tried counseling and was disappointed in the counselors I saw...I went to the doctor and was prescribed Effexor which helped significantly with my anxiety...and after reading the book Blue Genes by Dr. Paul Meier I decided that my only option for healing was to take a significant time off work, and go to treatment....
Present: Yes...and I believe that I do...I would seek out help and do the hard work if it got to the point I needed it...
What you are hiding has now been identified...now what? That is a fantastic question...
First, Just SIT with it...sit with the truth for a while...it is going to be uncomfortable..it is going to be painful...and it might even take you a while to accept...
Second, Once you have accepted what you are hiding...share it with someone...
Bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.
-Galatians 6:2
we are wired for community...and you will be surprised, when you share your hidden and protected places with others, how many people will whisper "me too." You are not alone...
Third, assess your options for help...
- do you have health insurance?
- if so, do they cover counseling... GO! it may take a couple of counselors to find one that 'clicks' with you and that is okay...don't get discouraged...
- if you have tried counseling and you don't feel like it is enough does your insurance cover outpatient treatment?
- if you do not have insurance, there are a lot of places that offer their services on a sliding scale fee related to your income... another option is go to your pastor or a pastor in the community...be honest about where you are...and ask for help...most pastor's have a large network they can tap into when there is a legitimate need...and your mental health IS LEGITIMATE...
You guys, I am pretty excited about this Reflection, Contemplation, Application series that I will be doing every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday...the beauty of the internet is that you don't have to do it in THREE days if you aren't ready...please go at your pace...ask questions, be vulnerable, and let's all be broken, broken, people together!!!!
Carelessly
April
Third, assess your options for help...
- do you have health insurance?
- if so, do they cover counseling... GO! it may take a couple of counselors to find one that 'clicks' with you and that is okay...don't get discouraged...
- if you have tried counseling and you don't feel like it is enough does your insurance cover outpatient treatment?
- if you do not have insurance, there are a lot of places that offer their services on a sliding scale fee related to your income... another option is go to your pastor or a pastor in the community...be honest about where you are...and ask for help...most pastor's have a large network they can tap into when there is a legitimate need...and your mental health IS LEGITIMATE...
You guys, I am pretty excited about this Reflection, Contemplation, Application series that I will be doing every Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday...the beauty of the internet is that you don't have to do it in THREE days if you aren't ready...please go at your pace...ask questions, be vulnerable, and let's all be broken, broken, people together!!!!
Carelessly
April
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