Gains and Losses day here at Careless in the Care of God...where I will review what I have gained and lost during the last two weeks of my journey to health...

O.K., so we have reflected on my story...contemplated some hard questions...now, it is time to apply what we have discovered... 

As I shared in yesterday's post after receiving the results from my psychological testing there was a freedom in being 'found out.'

In January 2008 my story to wholeness began. I drove to Wheaton IL to begin a journey to treatment and healing. Healing from a lifetime of struggling with this thing we so readily acknowledge as depression and his best friend anxiety. 

I spent three weeks in INTENSIVE outpatient treatment at the Meier Clinic. This included medication management, group therapy, individual therapy, and psychological testing, it was also faith based. 

Four months prior I began preparing emotionally and spiritually to lift myself out of the life that wasn't working for me and place myself into a 3 week intensive treatment program for depression and debilitating anxiety.

I have decided for mental health reasons to only do Gains and Losses every OTHER Monday...I am getting too tied into the number and need to allow myself more time between weighing-in...

Also, I attended a life changing conference over the weekend...I received more quality instruction than my head could ever hold and was encouraged by a new friend to make a few changes in my current plan...so I have committed myself to make changes both in my real life and in here on the blog...I am clarifying, and identifying steps that need to be taken to achieve what I believe to be God's purpose in my life...

Carelessly,

April

A few months after we had to let Little Bit go...a very thoughtful blog friend sent me a gorgeous scrapbook in memory of Little Bit…

Today is the 2nd anniversary of my Little Bit leaving us...I thought I would re-post what I wrote on that day...

my love for her hasn't weakened, and there are still days when I think she is going to be at the door to greet me, or that I can leave that crumb on the floor because she will come eat it up...and then I get sad, and I miss her all over again...and that is OK because even in the missing of her there is some joy...